“Grown Sexy”

Was there anything to watch on TV last night? I just couldn’t find anything. Just kidding. Let’s fight one battle at a time and tackle the Bachelor wedding first.

Disclaimer: This may or may not be the most confusing ramble you have ever read. It may leave you scratching your head or possibly you will end up doubled over laughing. Hopefully the latter. 

First things first- What the hell is grown sexy? Catherine was trying so hard to make that a thing, but it’s not. Sexy and sophisticated perhaps. (Thanks Fallan!) I understand she wanted pretty and elegant but not boring. She wanted to be a big girl, for lack of a better term, and prove that she’s an adult who can be viewed in a sexy manner on a day that is supposed to be about tradition and innocence. Fine. Just stop saying grown sexy or even just sexy every other word. If there is anything I will remember most about last night’s nuptials, it is how uncomfortable I felt. That could also have something to do with me being the least romantic girl in America.

Next, THE DRESSES. I have two of the best jobs in the entire world. One of which is working in a prom and social occasion boutique. Naturally, I noticed Catherine and the bridesmaids dresses immediately. The whole wedding was so soft and elegant. Apologies, Catherine, I just  don’t see the “sexy” side with pastel colors and peonies. Don’t get me wrong though, that’s just the way I like it. Catherine’s gown was a strapless lace empire waist, embellished with a beaded belt tucked just behind her pink peonies in the picture below. The lace is absolutely sexy but in the most sophisticated way possible.  The bridesmaids soft pink gowns are so gorgeous. I love the simplicity of the dresses and the color scheme throughout the entire bridal party. I mean, could they be any more gorgeous?

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PS- Lesley, third in from the left, is still my favorite gal in the history of Bachelor history. Just find it a little strange she was in her ex-boyfriends wedding but #YOLO. (I hope you all know I’m seriously kidding when I use that term. Okay good.)

Let us briefly discuss how precious Sean’s dad was when they asked him to officiate the ceremony! That just melted my heart. His reaction was so shocked but so genuinely honored and thrilled at the same time. I absolutely loved it. However, I never know what’s real and what isn’t and it drives me crazy. For instance, how much did Catherine really plan? Was it their idea to have Sean’s dad officiate? Have they actually saved themselves for the wedding night? (That one is bullsh** and I don’t believe it for a minute. I think it was all for publicity and the more it came up the more frustrated I became.) After my 15 minutes of fame in a flashmob on HGTV, I don’t believe a thing I see on TV anymore. Cold world.

Lastly, Sean crying at the end of the ceremony was absolutely genuine (I hope) and sweet. I love the thought of a guy being so happy and overwhelmed to be spending the rest of his life with his bride. My future husband better have some water in the eyes. However, pull it together man. She wasn’t even crying like that. (See, there’s that lack of romance thing again.)

All in all the wedding was absolutely gorgeous and so were the bride and groom.

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If you aren’t following me on twitter (@pearls_sass) and you missed me life tweeting last night, you’re only living half of a life. Just sayin’ ya’ll.

NEXT UP, GRAMMYS!

I have to admit that I did miss a lot of the Grammy’s due to the wedding and my lack of ADHD meds. Whatever. I caught the two most important parts of the evening. Beyonce proving she is Queen Bey and Lorde winning a grammy for Royals.  Okay so Lorde makes me kind of uncomfortable. She is strange and looks like she’s 40. She’s 17. Yikes, girl. If you watch her performance however, she is just super into the music and the performance, she can feel it in her body and you can’t fault a performer for that. I understand because Royals makes me sassy. Despite the two Grammy’s I think perhaps the biggest victory of the night? Being tweeted about MORE than Beyonce!

Beyonce had a sexy show stopping performance with husband JayZ, snuggled with some PDA in the audience while also sipping cognac (wine?). She really is Queen and everyone knows it. It’s Beyonce’s world and we are all just visiting. Until Lorde is tweeted about more. Did hell freeze over last night? I’m confused.

What did you all think of last night’s events? I can’t wait to hear different opinions! Enjoy your Monday!

XOXO

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2 comments

  1. I was also flipping between the Bachelor wedding and the Grammy’s last night! I am glad someone else doesn’t fully get the whole “grown sexy” concept…it was a bit strange, but overall a gorgeous wedding.

    Nicole, keepcalmandcocoon.com

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